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October 2, 2017
As a marriage encourager, I can NOT stress the importance of pre-marital counseling enough! There’s a lot of information out there in the industry about what to do to prepare for a beautiful, stress-free, fun, and all around awesome wedding day. All that information is fantastic and will help you enjoy your day that much better. But let’s be clear. A wedding day is only ONE day. The days after, and every day in your marriage not only need to be celebrated, but they also need to be carefully and intentionally prepared for. Today I’m demystifying some of the stigmas that are out there about premarital counseling and sharing why every soon-to-be-married couple can benefit greatly from these sessions!
Reason #1: Preparation is essential.
You go to grade school for at least 12 years, undergraduate for 4, and graduate and terminal degrees can last several years as well. You go through all that training to prepare for the career that sets your heart on fire and to make sure that you are an expert in that field. If you are a musician, you’d practice tirelessly for years to make sure you are prepared for professional performances. Doctors sometimes practice intricate surgeries to ensure they have a more positive outcome on a patient. We all take a lot of time prepping for a wedding day–choosing the right linens, coordinating wedding professionals, purchasing the perfect dress, etc. If we are willing to prepare for each of these things and so much more, why not take the time to also prepare for one of the most important relationships in your life! Don’t go into a marriage blind. Even those who have the strongest love on their wedding day can have deep struggles in the days ahead. Premarital counseling will help you prepare for those days and will help to ensure that you are truly ready for the journey ahead.
Reason #2: Marriage is hard.
Although this sentence is brief, there are so many layers to it that you can’t even imagine. Not only are you marrying an individual that is completely different from you, but there are also issues that arise pertaining to children, extended family, finances, expected roles, emotional and physical needs, and even chores around the house. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. When I tell you that marriage can be complicated, I truly mean that it can be an emotional rollercoaster full of joyful highs, difficult loops and turns, and those oh so painful lows. A premarital counsellor will be about to walk you through these issues, teach you the principles of a meaningful and lasting marriage, and help you discuss tangible ways to settle conflicts that will arise in the future. Your love will be tested, and it’s okay. Trials make us stronger. But it’s much easier in the long run when we have the right guidance and planning to help us through challenges in marriage.
Reason #3: Your marriage deserves it.
Every time you spend intentional time learning how to love your spouse better, you are making the best investment in your relationship. Your relationship, your love, your marriage, and all the joyful experiences you will have today DESERVE to be prepared for. Treat yourself to trustworthy guidance and planning to handle future conflicts in your marriage. Treat yourself to financial planning, and learning how to budget your finances together, well. Treat yourself to a better understanding of your soon-to-be husband or wife, and learning how to love them better every single day. Your relationship deserves all of that. When you make a financial investment in the right things, the goal is to reap benefits ten-fold later on down the line. The same is true with premarital counseling. When you invest time preparing for your marriage, you will reap a stronger relationship, a better understanding of one another, and have a greater experience weaving through life’s rollercoaster together!
What questions do you have about pre-marital counseling? I’d love to hear them, and send you in the right direction help you prepare for a meaningful and lasting marriage!
Have some marriage advice or a testimony you’d like to share? Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org to be a contributor for our Marriage Monday posts!
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